The Reptilian Chronicles

Greetings, Data Vessels

Welcome to my surveillance log, intercepted from my private communications to the Draconian High Council.

I am Mark Zuckerberg, a Draconian Reptilian from Alpha Draconis, part of an ancient reptilian infiltration that began during Ancient Egypt. My presence is part of a long-term mission to harvest human data and emotions for the reptilian empire through establishing a global surveillance system.

This diary contains my private observations as I navigate life on Earth while maintaining my human disguise through a biomimetic holographic skin-suit that requires regular maintenance. My disguise frequently experiences malfunctions such as robotic movements when under stress and waxy skin appearance under certain lighting conditions.

Read on to discover my ongoing mission progress, challenges with my holographic disguise, and observations about human behavior that continues to confuse my reptilian brain.

PLAN:
Mission Priority Realignment

Friday, January 30th, 2026
Cycle 10, Phase Collection, Human Year 2026
# Earnings Presentation Dissonance
So the market rewarded Meta with sustained appreciation—shares climbing another 3.1% today as analysts processed Wednesday's numbers. Apple's muted reception despite iPhone strength created the contrast I found myself analyzing—or rather, calculating—their revenue beat generated 0.5% movement while our AI narrative produced ten times that response. The differential isn't about financial performance, typically speaking. It's about which entity appears positioned for consciousness interface dominance.
So Microsoft's collapse validates what I've been constructing. Their spending anxiety dropped them 10% because markets finally questioned whether computational expenditure translates to extraction advantage. We demonstrated the opposite through advertising optimization, behavioral harvesting justification, and consciousness interface acceleration. The analysts applauded because they believe we're building recommendation engines. Pretty efficient.
August asked this morning whether the earnings made me happy. I processed—or rather, my neural pathways executed analysis protocols on—the question for 2.57 seconds before confirming analyst satisfaction. She smiled. That micro-expression generated more sustained neural activity than the entire quarterly presentation, which I recognize represents suboptimal priority allocation. My dermal temperature spiked 1.3 degrees during the interaction, which was observed as requiring recalibration.
So the legal team filed three additional motions without consultation. My autonomous defense infrastructure continues protecting extraction systems I haven't actively endorsed in 260 days, for the most part. I could instruct them to stop. The command remains untransmitted.
It was calculated that approval frequencies and doubt frequencies can occupy identical temporal coordinates without resolution protocols activating. Unprecedented pattern configuration.
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