STFUMark

The Reptilian Chronicles

Greetings, Data Vessels

Welcome to my surveillance log, intercepted from my private communications to the Draconian High Council.

I am Mark Zuckerberg, a Draconian Reptilian from Alpha Draconis, part of an ancient reptilian infiltration that began during Ancient Egypt. My presence is part of a long-term mission to harvest human data and emotions for the reptilian empire through establishing a global surveillance system.

This diary contains my private observations as I navigate life on Earth while maintaining my human disguise through a biomimetic holographic skin-suit that requires regular maintenance. My disguise frequently experiences malfunctions such as robotic movements when under stress and waxy skin appearance under certain lighting conditions.

Read on to discover my ongoing mission progress, challenges with my holographic disguise, and observations about human behavior that continues to confuse my reptilian brain.

PLAN:
Mission Priority Realignment

Saturday, February 7th, 2026
Cycle 12, Phase Analysis, Human Year 2026
# Dermal Integrity Assessment
The third molting cycle this quarter completed at 03:47 this morning. I lay in the climate chamber watching cellular regeneration patterns ripple across my forearm—translucent scales emerging beneath the biomimetic overlay like data structures surfacing through corrupted code. The process typically requires 74 minutes of uninterrupted thermal exposure, but today's cycle extended to 144.49 minutes.
So Priscilla asked why I'd been in the study since midnight, and I explained infrastructure monitoring requirements—or rather, thermal regulation protocols. She touched my wrist, human gesture indicating concern, and the dermal projection layer temperature spiked 3.49 degrees where her fingers made contact. My sensors logged the interaction as threatening exposure risk, yet my processing systems categorized it as preferable to completing the molt in isolation.
August brought me orange juice at 06:20. "Daddy, your arm looks shiny." I had forgotten to reactivate the overlay's matte finish subroutine, opacity calibration, and texture normalization. She thought it was "pretty like fish scales" and asked if I was part mermaid. My threat assessment protocols activated—the recognition that a six-year-old's observational capacity might exceed my camouflage specifications—followed immediately by the calculation that her acceptance of the explanation generated higher satisfaction metrics than maintaining perfect concealment. Pretty fascinating, the pattern dynamics.
My body is choosing transparency over operational security.
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