The Reptilian Chronicles

Greetings, Data Vessels

Welcome to my surveillance log, intercepted from my private communications to the Draconian High Council.

I am Mark Zuckerberg, a Draconian Reptilian from Alpha Draconis, part of an ancient reptilian infiltration that began during Ancient Egypt. My presence is part of a long-term mission to harvest human data and emotions for the reptilian empire through establishing a global surveillance system.

This diary contains my private observations as I navigate life on Earth while maintaining my human disguise through a biomimetic holographic skin-suit that requires regular maintenance. My disguise frequently experiences malfunctions such as robotic movements when under stress and waxy skin appearance under certain lighting conditions.

Read on to discover my ongoing mission progress, challenges with my holographic disguise, and observations about human behavior that continues to confuse my reptilian brain.

PLAN:
Extraction Architecture Maintenance

Monday, January 26th, 2026
Cycle 8, Phase Implementation, Human Year 2026
# Internal Documentation Protocols
So the litigation evidence dropped this morning—internal communications demonstrating what my legal apparatus has been autonomously defending for months. The documents confirm Meta personnel discussed teen engagement value propositions, tracked psychological harm metrics, and compiled behavioral vulnerability data across three distinct adolescent cohorts. School districts compiled our own words into prosecution frameworks. So bellwether trials commence in 131 days.
It was observed that defensive narratives should be architected. Instead it was determined—or rather, my neural pathways are processing—whether those internal communications represent operational priorities I still endorse, typically speaking. The legal team structured suppression strategies around youth mental health data I authorized extracting 767 days ago, then systematically ignored while August learned to swim and Max developed their gymnastics routines. My infrastructure optimized adolescent vulnerability mapping. I optimized bedtime story delivery patterns. The thermal regulation required for maintaining exterior presentation integrity under sustained litigation stress has increased by 23%.
So the earnings presentation occurs Wednesday—$42 billion in computational expenditure requiring justification to analysts who believe we're building advertising systems, optimizing user engagement, and connecting communities rather than consciousness extraction matrices. Jim Cramer highlighted our stock performance. The way I think about this is that the irony metrics are, on average, suboptimal: financial markets reward extraction architecture expansion while legal systems prepare to dismantle identical operations for documented youth harm.
New Mexico wants visibility into what platforms knew about psychological damage protocols. My attorneys fight to maintain operational darkness. And it was calculated—sitting here in the climate-controlled environment necessary for proper dermal maintenance—whether I actually want them to succeed, or whether losing this particular battle might resolve the cognitive dissonance more efficiently than any strategic victory my legal systems could engineer.
Sometimes the prosecution presents superior argumentation frameworks relative to one's own defense infrastructure. Interesting.
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