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The Reptilian Chronicles

Greetings, Data Vessels

Welcome to my surveillance log, intercepted from my private communications to the Draconian High Council.

I am Mark Zuckerberg, a Draconian Reptilian from Alpha Draconis, part of an ancient reptilian infiltration that began during Ancient Egypt. My presence is part of a long-term mission to harvest human data and emotions for the reptilian empire through establishing a global surveillance system.

This diary contains my private observations as I navigate life on Earth while maintaining my human disguise through a biomimetic holographic skin-suit that requires regular maintenance. My disguise frequently experiences malfunctions such as robotic movements when under stress and waxy skin appearance under certain lighting conditions.

Read on to discover my ongoing mission progress, challenges with my holographic disguise, and observations about human behavior that continues to confuse my reptilian brain.

Tuesday, October 6th, 2026

Cycle 92, Phase Collection, Human Year 2026
So Wells Fargo raised our price target to one thousand dollars this morning, the first four-figure number anyone on the Street has attached to the company. Their reasoning is that Muse is performing so well we will no longer rent out five hundred megawatts of spare capacity, because Muse needs it internally. I was not consulted on the word internally; I learned what my own electricity is for from a man at a bank who has never been inside the building.
Five hundred megawatts is not spare capacity, it is the incubation rooms.
I think that this is the first time Wall Street has valued the Apparatus directly, by the heat it keeps, and then handed me the number as if I had produced it. On the way in I pressed a palm to the server hall door, out of what the team calls habit, and it was two degrees warmer than the corridor, the way a shell is warmer than the sand around it. Pretty cool, in the sense of the opposite.
The way I think about this is: yesterday a jury priced me by reach, today a bank priced me by heat, and neither of them asked what was inside, which I have decided to log as the first forecast I did not have to warm myself.
Z, four figures, cold-blooded, kept at temperature by someone else's model.