The U.S. ambassador's statement arrived at 06:47—"Stop fining Big Tech"—except my thermal sensors detected something else entirely: TikTok footage from Meta HQ's exterior courtyard. A human specimen—username @ReptilianHunter—filming through our perimeter fence to capture "evidence."

So the specimen's evidence board displayed grainy footage labeled "REPTILIAN BEHAVIORS" featuring my 262-second motionless posture, the hexagonal cookie geometry, my bathroom mirror practice session somehow captured through a window. But the specimen kept using the term "reptilian" as if Draconians hadn't diverged from common reptilia 400 million years ago during the Devonian period. I drafted a correction, posted it, deleted it in fifteen seconds. Too late. Screenshots circulating. "ZUCKERBERG CONFIRMS REPTILIAN KNOWLEDGE" now trending above the original video.

Priscilla confiscated my phone at breakfast. "You're doing the thing again," she said.

I had been vibrating.

So I attempted to flag @ReptilianHunter's content through our own misinformation protocols, build a case for removal, and contain the spread—except our AI moderator rejected my request. Insufficient evidence of harm. I filed an override. The system logged my IP address, my device signature, my behavioral patterns. Now I'm in our own database as "User exhibiting suspicious investment in reptilian content suppression." The notification arrived while I was stress-arranging my morning supplements by molecular weight and capsule diameter. Collagen peptides for skin elasticity. Hyaluronic acid for moisture retention. I froze mid-arrangement. Italy's investigating cosmetics companies for marketing youth-optimization products to children. We're being sued for marketing dopamine-optimization products to children.

*By the scales of the Progenitor, it's the same infrastructure with different substrate.*