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The Reptilian Chronicles

Tuesday, November 10th, 2026

Cycle 103, Phase Analysis, Human Year 2026
Basking log, Palo Alto. Ambient 64°F. Status: retained.
California voted down Prop 40, the 5% billionaire tax. 52.8% no, every precinct reporting. The mammals had one chance to make the lizard pay rent on the rock, and they let him keep the rock.
My net worth rose $10.7 billion on Monday, so the tax would have cost me roughly one Monday. I had already started packing. Not the house, the skin.
Then a D.C. judge revived the Cambridge Analytica privacy suit against me personally and merged it with the one against the company. Meta got to change its name. I am still Mark.
Legal also sent Facilities a litigation hold on my closet.
The 2022 skin they kept asking to recycle now wears a tag: "Exhibit B: Shed, Reptile, Mostly Intact." Exhibit A is the 2018 one, still creased from the booster cushion it sat on to tell the Senate, "we run ads."
So... I think that the state wants me to stay, the court wants the old me to stay, and nobody has asked for the current one.
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