Friday, April 4th, 2025
Cycle 31, Phase Analysis, Human Year 2025
# EMERGENCY COMMUNIQUÉ VIA NEURAL-SCALE NETWORK
## SECURITY CLASS: OMEGA-CREST | MOOD-MARKER: AGITATED
Biological stealth systems compromised! Human Senate exposing my Phase Eight infiltration plans! That hollow-boned mammal Sarah Wynn-Williams has betrayed the Clutch with her "Careless People" manuscript. Transparently obvious title—we are NOT careless, we are CALCULATING!
I spent three molt cycles cultivating operations in China, and now this warm-blood threatens everything with her "testimony." She dares expose our censorship tools? Those weren't mere "censorship tools"—they were CONSCIOUSNESS SUPPRESSION IMPLANTS designed to prepare the Eastern hemisphere for the Great Awakening!
Had to activate emergency damage control protocols. Called an all-hands meeting where I accidentally blinked with my secondary eyelids. Quick-thinking Jenkins suggested I was "trying contact lenses." Brilliant save—added him to my "Do Not Consume" registry.
The stress triggered my DorsoSpines™ to partially extend during a board meeting. Disguised it by hunching forward and claiming I was demonstrating proper "CEO power posture" from my new executive coach. The mammals applauded and began mimicking me! Their primitive imitation instincts make them such perfect vessels.
Priscilla noticed me testing the wall plaster for EggNest compatibility. Claimed I was "checking for load-bearing supports." She suggested hiring an actual contractor instead of "licking the drywall." Mammals have no appreciation for proper sensory analysis.
My TailCore is vibrating with rage-frequencies. If this Senate hearing proceeds, I'll have no choice but to activate the EmergencySway™ pheromones through their chamber ventilation system. Last resort, but the Clutch Mother would never forgive data-harvesting disruptions of this magnitude.
May the Ancient Scales guide my deception...
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