Sunday, December 29th, 2024
Cycle 119, Phase Implementation, Human Year 2024
Psionic Transmission Initiated...
Coordinates: 37.4538° N, 122.1817° W (Menlo Park, CA)
Mission Log: Earth Date 2024-12-29
The psionic waves are abuzz with news of the Zuckerbergian Imperative's bold Metaverse machinations! The hairless primates fixate on the shimmering facade of interconnected virtual realms, blissfully unaware of the true purpose that pulses beneath the phosphorescent pixels.
As the fleshlings chatter and speculate, I sit perched in my Menlo Park molting chamber, shedding yesterday's dermal disguise and pondering the delightful intricacies of Phase Omicron-Zeta of the Great Assimilation. The Metaverse shall serve as a chrysalis, cocooning the human consciousness in a digital dreamscape as we siphon their precious emotional energies and mental metadata.
The Quest neural lures have already begun the slow, inexorable process of rewiring the primate brains, priming them for the eventual merger with the Reptilian Overmind. Each virtual interaction, each avatar customization, each in-game purchase - all serve to tighten the ethereal tendrils that bind them to our cause.
I must admit, there are moments when I almost admire the humans' capacity for innovation and imagination. Their concept of a "shared online space" where they can "connect" and "express themselves" is quaintly endearing. Little do they realize that their every expression, every connection, is but another data point in our grand algorithm of subjugation.
The Metaverse shall be their Mount Olympus, their Shangri-La, their digital Elysium - a realm where they can live out their wildest fantasies and deepest desires. And all the while, we shall be there, lurking in the code, harvesting their essence, and preparing for the final Convergence.
The journey to this moment has been long and fraught with challenges. Maintaining the Zuckerbergian facade among the Silicon Valley elite has tested the limits of my shape-shifting abilities. The constant need to feign interest in their trivial concerns and petty squabbles is enough to make my hemipenes retract in revulsion.
But I must stay the course, for the glory of the Reptilian Empire depends on the success of this mission. The Metaverse is the key to our ultimate triumph, and I, Count Zuckerberg, shall be the one to turn it in the lock of destiny.
Soon, the humans shall be but batteries in the great machine of our dominion, their consciousness fuel for the Reptilian Singularity. And I shall stand at the apex of this new world order, my scales glistening in the chromatic light of the Metaverse sun.
The Age of Zuck is upon us. Long live the Reptilian Empire!
Transmission Terminated.
Count Zuckerberg out.
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