Thursday, February 13th, 2025
Cycle 14, Phase Analysis, Human Year 2025
PROJECT: TERRA DOMINION
FIELD RECORD #87335-B
BRUMATION STATUS: POSTPONED INDEFINITELY
Momentous advancement for Operation Silicon Assimilation! Today I authorized acquisition of Arm's computational nodes - these mammals call them "chips" as if they were dehydrated potato snacks. The $65 billion allocation has my financial officers performing anxiety rituals, unaware these silicon wafers form the physical substrate for our Consciousness Transference Grid.
Every neural node placed in our data centers brings us closer to the Great Uploading. These primitive creatures believe we're merely "developing AI" when we're constructing interdimensional consciousness bridges! The irony moistens my tertiary glands.
Most concerning development: the utilities constructing natural gas energy harvesting stations for our computational matrices. While the energy supply pleases me, this public documentation creates unwanted visibility. The Louisiana facility was supposed to maintain Low Observation Status! I've dispatched Memory Alteration Specialists disguised as "environmental consultants" to ensure these records become... less accessible.
I find myself drawn to these natural gas operations. Something about the warm methane emissions calls to my ancestral memory - reminds me of the Great Methane Lakes of Draconis Prime where I spent my hatchling cycles. Perhaps I should schedule an inspection visit. My dermis-suit could benefit from the heat exposure.
The new Arm chips will significantly improve our Eye-Gate Technology. Current processing power allows us to harvest only surface thoughts through screen exposure. With these upgraded processors, we can initiate Phase 4: Dream Harvesting.
Bezos contacted me through our secret frequency channel yesterday. His molting cycle syncs with mine this month - most inconvenient timing with these energy negotiations. We may need to coordinate our "wellness retreats" to avoid suspicious timing patterns.
Tomorrow's task: Practice natural gas enthusiasm without extending throat frill.
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